The DNA results that is! We never expected to get them back this fast. It had taken about 10 weeks to get my results and those of my sister and brother returned to us, so we were expecting it to be at least mid-October before we heard anything. So, when David messaged me to call him and sent his phone number, it never occurred to me that it was because he knew something I didn’t. I should have–he hadn’t shared that sort of private information with me before–but I just thought it was because we’d been getting a little closer and he was ready for that step.

But then he told me…we’re a match! 23andme had us as grandfather and granddaughter, but since it had had my other brother and me as uncle and niece, I’d been through this before and explained that it couldn’t tell how we were related when we only shared one parent, only that we were very closely related.

We spent the first 10 minutes of the phone call just giggling and saying breathless “Wow”s again and again, and then we settled in for some real conversation. We chatted for an hour, finding similarities in our personalities, learning about each other and simply sharing ourselves. He is a wonderful person…simply wonderful. Giving, kind, loving. I regret I haven’t known him all my life. I think he could have taught me a lot. Perhaps he still can!

I don’t know if my other siblings from that side of the family will ever reach out. I know it’s so difficult for them for a variety of reasons, and I can’t fault them their feelings. I’ve felt that anger and betrayal from a couple of different perspectives (both as the betrayed wife and the child bearing the betrayal of the parent who was cheated on), so I can guess a little something about what they must be feeling. I’ll be here if they ever reach out. (Some of their children already have.) But I won’t ever push them. That’s just not me. I hope I was thrust into their lives for a reason, though. I hope my existence serves some purpose for them…perhaps to teach an important lesson they desperately need to learn, perhaps to provide donor tissue when no one else possesses the right match, perhaps to be a friend when they need one.

Now, I just need to find a way to muster the courage to tell my extended family…my wonderful uncle and cousins I adore. I don’t want to hurt them, but I think they deserve to know, and I deserve not to have to keep this from them. I’m sad that we’re not related by blood, but I know they are my family never-the-less. I’m happy that I have a new family with members who are so willing to embrace me. I’m happy that I feel an explainable bond and kinship with them…a familiarity that I’ve always yearned to feel but couldn’t. I feel complete for the first time in my life, and I think that’s a good thing.